I'm not really sure why you targeted my 1997 Corolla with its various nicks and dents, and four tires without hubcaps. Had you inspected it closely before prying open the front passenger door with what I can only assume was a crowbar, you might have noticed that the back passenger door was, in fact, unlocked. I guess you also assumed that I was hiding something really great by your thoroughness in emptying the glove box and CD nook (I am shocked that you couldn't fetch something for that Glee: Volume 5 CD on the crack market). I also take offense that you left my 5-year-old FM iPod transmitter plugged into the cigarette lighter, and ignored my 5-year-old Garmin Nuvi. I am thrilled, however, that when you moved on to the trunk you didn't want my Trader Joe's shopping bags, my very nice Sam's insulated grocery bag (which allows many a carton of ice cream to make it home from the store without melting in the summertime), or my fabulous hot pink and zebra waterproof picnic blanket (because I love it!). It would have been nice of you to take the bags of clothes I've been driving around for months with the intent to donate to Goodwill, instead of just strewing the articles around my trunk.
You, sir or madam, put a real damper on my morning.
